After informing me that I “totally rock,” Jenny Lawson (oh yeah … you bet your ass I’m totally bragging about this again) offered me some small advice on how to grow my blog. The key is to connect to other bloggers and comment, comment, comment like crazy. Initially, I opposed this idea because I hate people as a sweeping generalization. Not like I hate republicans or I hate homophobes; I just fucking hate people (unless I’ve birthed them). But, I took her advice all the same, and am actually finding myself quite pleased with the results. In reaching out to other like minds, I was told I would find my “tribe.” I thought that term was bizarre, but it turns out that’s a thing too just like “butt-fucking Egypt.” I have been learning a lot more about blogging. I don’t struggle with the stories; I can bitch like nobody’s business. But, I don’t know much about html or java script, and am learning that these are crucial skills in building a successful blog. Until earlier this week, I thought a “badge” was just something a police officer might be showing me for public intoxication or nudity.
This past week, I also attended my first “link party.” I am, however, fairly certain that my blog did not at all belong linked up to the site I found. I was featured right behind a link on how to clean your refrigerator correctly and best slow cooker lasagna recipes. Hmmmm … not my tribe. Really, how do those bitches do it all? Who has time to make their own organic baby food, sew their children’s Halloween costumes, create their own year supply of laundry detergent, hand-dip vanilla spice candles, build their own shoe organizer, decorate their home for the holidays with handmade crafts of Styrofoam, twigs, and berries … and still fucking blog about it all? Seriously, I am asking you how because some days I don’t even shower and my daughter is running around the house wearing several pairs of my underwear around her neck (she loves to accessorize) while I attempt to fold the laundry.
So, my first link party was a total fail. I needed to find a place where I really belonged. Is there a place for people like me who aren’t perfect – but are somehow perfectly flawed? After the quilting party kicked me out, I sought out a site that would actually want to feature a blog like me. Alas! I already feel I have found this tribe. I knew immediately – just like I knew when I had found my soul mate. By the way, my soul mate is not my spouse, but was my queer best friend. Sometimes life works out like that, and you start sleeping naked with a man the same night you meet him – but honestly just sleeping, no touching because tits scare him.
I’m hoping to build my tribe in the yeah write community. Yeah Write is essentially an online coffee house for creative types which describes itself as “1 part blogging showcase, 2 parts writing challenge, and 3 parts bathtub gin.” Fucking perfect, right? No mention of slow cookers or cloth diapers! Each week, yeah write offers an opportunity for bloggers to have their work featured on the site and reviewed by peers. There are a few rules for submitted work. For example, the post must be under 1,000 words and must have a narrative. The folks at yeah write say they want a “so what?” to the story. This, too, is fabulous because I often wrote these two very words in the margin of student essays. Okay, you wrote a story about losing your baseball game – so what? Why should I care? Make me care.
Right now, I know you may be wondering the same thing – so what? Why are you telling us all this Angela? Why should we fucking care? This shit isn’t funny; be funny. I’m telling you this so that you are aware I won’t always be funny. I plan to start sharing my yeah write submissions on this site. Many of them are likely to be a departure from what you have been accustomed to so far. I want to further experiment with my writing. And, as per the yeah write guidelines, my entries must have a narrative. You can all admit that most of my posts thus far have been random stream of consciousness crazy ass nonsense.
Don’t worry all six of my faithful followers (you know who you are and I fucking love you) – you’ll still be witness to my righteous vulgarity. However, you’re also going to see a side of me that is even more exposed – and frail, and frightened, and vulnerable. Although my tone may change in some of the upcoming writing challenges, here’s what you can also depend on me for: TRUTH. The shit is about to really get real. This is all a true story. Buckle up for the ride bitches because I’m taking it to overdrive.
As always, you can follow Not Appropriate Angela on facebook. You should probably start doing that right now.