Saturday, November 16, 2013

Bitches Be Crazy


If wearing a dress made of meat and arriving at an awards ceremony in a pod weren’t enough past evidence to confirm that Lady Gaga is crazy, her new single has most certainly cemented her certifiable status for me.  Quite honestly, I excused most of her appalling apparel choices as artistic expression.  However, her latest song lacks any quality creative lyrical content, but it did indeed manage to catch my attention as I was traveling today. 
I thought I was mistaken when I heard the disc jockey announce, “And here’s the latest from Lady Gaga featuring R. Kelly.” 
I turned to my husband, who was seated in the driver’s seat, and asked, mouth agape, “Did she really just say R. Kelly? Like mother-fucking ‘trapped in the closet’ R. Kelly?  What the fuck?”
He nodded in affirmation, also announcing, “Yeah, I think so.”  As curiosity so too got the better of him, he turned the volume dial up. 
We then heard Lady Gaga’s vocals repeating, “Do what u want with my body, baby. Do what u want with my body, baby.”  
 
 
Damn. This bitch be bat-shit crazy.  She’s telling R. Kelly he can do what he wants with her body?  Doesn’t she know shit about R. Kelly? (pun intended) If he does what he wants, this duet is going to end up with a face full of feces.  And you can’t use the other fucking two letters? Y-O-U! Ugh … we’re raising a generation of morons with this crap.
Does no one have any decency these days?  I’m about to collect all my CDs and DVDs and hole myself up in my basement because every time I listen to the radio, turn on the TV, or search around online, I am simply appalled by what I find.  You got scrawny little Miley Cyrus running around twerking and smoking joints with her weird looking ass exposed.  You got her cracked up predecessor Britney back telling you to work bitch.  And now you have Lady Gaga and R. Kelly in “the back of the club, taking shots, getting naughty like we don’t give a fuck.”   
Does no one give a fuck anymore?  Maybe media wouldn’t be overflowing with such filth if the masses had some intelligence and moral standards.  Get your shit together, people.  All these bitches be crazy, and we just keep the records playing in the back of the club like we don’t give a fuck.   Who’s up for another shot of Patron and some urine play?  Why not, right, Lady Gaga?
You all do what you want while I’m in my basement listening to Aimee Mann and Michael Penn.  Don’t interrupt me with today’s pop culture. 

11 comments:

  1. They are both batshit fucking crazy. 'Nuff said.

    Though to be fair, I do like *some* of Gaga's songs. Odds are high I won't dare admit that in public unless it's in a room full of shitfaced people who won't remember in the morning.

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    1. Indeed; they're both crazy. About 30 minutes after finishing this post, I turned on the TV and Lady Gaga was performing this song on SNL. It was so gross. R. Kelly dry humped and licked her. I'm going to carve my eyes out now (even though these are corneal transplants). Maybe I was lucky to have been blind before.

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  2. Phew...I thought my hatred of pop culture was cause I was getting old and that's why what's cool makes me shake my head. Nope..it is just that....pathetic. but maybe I would just rather be old.

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    1. It's not your age -- it's your brain. I don't understand how anyone with a brain can like this stuff.

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  3. This happens every generation. Our parents thought we were listening to filth, too. Except - I think we're actually right.

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    1. I know, but there's barely even innuendo anymore. Filth was around in every generation, but I too believe we're right because it's becoming more blatant and more prevalent.

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  4. I don't listen to the radio anymore. If I do, I end up switching stations searching for something decent to listen to and it's a total fail. Bat shit crazy for sure!

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    1. Indeed. Indeed. This is why if we do listen to the radio it's typically just to play our name the artist trivia game. We were too tired for that as we drove home yesterday, and so this post happened. :)

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  5. Whew. I'm so glad to read that someone younger than I feels that same way. I don't get why the majority of popular music on the top 40 has to be about the act of sex. And just vulgar. (how's that for an old school word?) It's not even sexy. At least to me.

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    1. I am totally agreed. Sticking your tongue out and pantomiming sex acts is so not sexy. There's still good music out there today, I believe, but unfortunately it's not what's being played.

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  6. I'm so with you on this one! Everything about LG's latest song was completely vapid: the lyrics, the music, the concepts. It is in every way devoid of value. And I did put it through my "am I just being an old fart?" filter first. It flunked.

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